Icky Hair Weeks Ahead

It is never wise to say to your hairdresser, 'oh.. just cut it the way you think it will look nice. But do try to keep the same length, mmmk?'

Because no matter what happens, it will never *be* what you wanted in the first place.

I should have just sat down, smiled up at her and said, the USUAL. But noooooOoOoO, yesterday I walk into her salon with a daring impulsive streak and uttered the upper infamous words.

I came home and entered the house trepidously for it is a well known fact that my spouse never thinks my hair needs cut, EVER, and that I could go through my life shaggy maned and will be you know.. HaWt that way, when in reality it looks like crap. Jennifer (my hairdresser) warned me that she was leaving right after she finished my hair, so I should tell my spouse that so he didn't come hunt her down and do... bodily harm. heh.. er.. not that he would do that, he is the most gentle person in the world! RIGHT?! Right.

Anyway.. so I open the door and consider sneaking right up to the bathroom where I can swath my head in a towel turban and come downstairs saying something like, whew! Needed to wash out all that MOUSSE Jennifer put in my hair, but within two steps I hear the call of 'hon?"

Dayam.

So... I slink into the living room, head hanging low to see him just... staring.

"When you said hair cut, I didn't realize you meant hair CUT. I mean.. it looks nice (I HATE THAT PHRASE FROM A MAN) but.. it is.. short."

So I stuttered around a bit about how this wasn't quite what I had planned and... well... cried and just felt miserable.

Today I want people to be sure that I am female, despite the short hair so am applying extra makeup. I have spritzed myself with the sexiest perfume I own (amber romance from Victoria's Secret. It could smell like bug spray but hey, if it has Victoria's secret on the bottle, it has to be sexy), looked for my sexiest and tightest blouse, high boots and .. er.. wait. They send kids home from school dressed like that.

I mean, I did the makeup and perfume part, but as far as dressing -- I am doing a lot of office cleaning today so I settled for low cut jeans and a collared tee.

Thank God Hair Grows Back. I figure by the end of the summer I shall be unquestionably female in appearance once again. Until then, just call me ambiguous.